In a Slump and Feeling a Little Blue

I don't allow myself to indulge in sadness for any length of time, but I have to admit that lately, I have been feeling defeated and at times, heavy hearted. Getting started in a new place, setting-up and organizing house (when there's little place to put things) and making it a home, establishing a routine with the kids, getting out to meet people and looking for opportunities for the kids to make friends - it all can be quite overwhelming at times. I feel like I've accomplished very little in the past few weeks. Some days, I feel like a failure in the simplest tasks.

I know a lot of this is natural with motherhood. There is very little to show for the hard work you've put in all day. The kids can undo what you've done in the home in a split second! Looking on in victory at the freshly vacuumed and scrubbed tile floor, you can be sure that some sticky juice will be spilt moments later, mixed in with muffin crumbs. The laundry never stops piling-up no matter how many loads you've done. All this is normal. Most days I can handle it. It's just that I am so behind in a lot of other things, maintaining the home has kept me from all the other tasks that I have on hold. And the pressure mounts.

O.K., this is going to be past me someday soon. But as evening came, I felt like another day had passed and there was not much to show for it. I have this urgency in life to make every day matter. I suppose today was about encouraging Isabella in her hard work in finishing the floor puzzle she and I were working on. And about working on assembling a train track with Liam. Those moments had to be what mattered. I can do the rest tomorrow and the next day and the next.

We did have a great time yesterday (Sunday) afternoon. We had a family day at the beach. It was the first day since we've been here that we had a beach day (other than being at the beach for the air show). The weather was perfect, the water deliciously cool for the 90 degree weather, the waves soft and perfect for playing in. The kids loved it. They didn't want to know about their shovel and pail and all the other gear we lugged onto the beach. They just wanted to play in the water. So all four of us spent most of the day in the water. I was in my element!